You have beat the odds, congratulations!
You and your family did your best to impress, and check out the results - you got that letter of acceptance. But don’t take all the credit mom and dad, Janie and Jimmie were the real stars. And, because of this we have our work cut out to support them. If you are really into an independent school education then I am confident you will navigate it well and proudly show up to graduation!
Let’s just make sure that we do a few things so that there is well-balanced retention. I mean, just keep an eye out for any opportunities to show up and support this environment with its challenging curriculum, expectations of attending ivy universities, incredible networks, great families, vast socio-economic variances, and the presence of a dominant culture.
So here are just a few strategies to get you and your family off to a fantastic start at your new school. I realize that the needs of a lower school family may be different than that of an upper school family, yet there are some fundamental truths about the institution itself that merits mention.
- Somehow, once you make that final leap called, “We got in!” then all of a sudden you are no longer looking into the window, your inside and that is precisely when you look around and notice that socio-economically what was once middle class is straight up at the poverty line. The amount of wealth that exists and the atmosphere of privilege can be intoxicating, and perhaps nauseating. Stay grounded and true to your set of norms for your family and express this to your children. It is tough to keep up with the Joneses!
- Get involved!!! Join something. A committee and affinity/support groups require consistency over time with meetings. But if time is not a commodity for you then support an annual event - sort of get in and get out. And by all means please donate to the annual fund in whatever denomination fits your budget-your name will be proudly displayed in annual report!
- Be prepared for a ton of birthday parties in lower school – especially kindergarten. And of course the bar/bat mitzvah in middle school. Prom, graduation and a new school to write a similar tuition to all in senior year.
- And last but not least, entering kindergarten or pre-k families, this early in the game your child’s apparent genius status is not a true indicator for independent school success, I mean really they are only 4 and 5 year olds. So, be diligent and patient over the next 12 years.
For more tips, check out the RIISE TOP 10 Brochure
SPOTLIGHT ON Independent School Mom Extraordinaire - Pat Jordan
4 Comments
I would also like to thank RIISE for providing this guidance to families that are new to the independent school world. One of the efforts our Pre-school’s PA under took this year was to introduce families new to the independent school world to alumni already at the schools. So far it has worked out pretty well. The alumni have been very supportive of this effort.
Your members are fortunate to receive this kind of advice. It’s an honest, straightforward and lighthearted approach to what can otherwise turn into serious issues that affect a child’s success in school. As you say, this is just a start. There’s so much more to be gained in support groups for kids and parents.
when we make the decision to send our children to independent schools, we mostly think about the extensive curriculum, beautiful science and tech labs, and the variety of sports. and we all have ivy league dreams. unfortunately many independent schools do not have support groups for kids or parents of color. its important that you find a family of color in your child’s class so you can both lean on someone. the walls of private schools are daunting, they can be lonely for our children, and everything usually seems lovely in the early years, however keep your eyes on the most important thing: is this the right school for my child? is my child being supported as an individual?
Thanks for sharing. Our 4 year old just got accepeted to a great independent school in the Westchester area and we are thrilled to be part of your organization. We appreciate the support and the candid nature of your blogs, newsletters and discussions. Thanks a million.
3 Trackbacks
[...] Congratulations! Now the real work begins [...]
[...] http://www.4riise.org/2010/03/congratulations-now-the-real-work-begins/#comments [...]
[...] – RSVP Now for more details! Sponsored by Riverdale Country School Related blog: Congratulations! Now the real work begins This entry was posted in Coming Soon, Events. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here [...]